Poetry

How This Poetry Section Works

Like your common everyday feed (sans-algorithm), this page has my most recent poems on top followed by all previously posted poems. I pretty much post them as I write them, after a short time of sitting with them and tweaking them. Poetry strikes as it will so I write where I can, when I can. I use pencils and pocket notebooks or full sheet tablets or an envelope just received. So there is no schedule to this “feed”. The poems collect as a prolific knitter places hats beside in a basket, one on top of another. They are here for you to read, skip, revisit, or ignore. They are here for me because I think it’s fun.

Light's Reputation

Light has a good reputation
It is brightness and happiness
truth and salvation
the bringer of knowledge
the chaser of sorrows

And yet maybe perhaps
we are blinding ourselves
Always on
in our faces
pointed up, down, out, and in

So bright we can’t sleep
Too many up close we can’t see
what’s far away
like starlight
Stars are not now enough for us

I miss the darkness
The cool, quiet, calm
The time to unwind
to be sad 
to be unseen

- Heidi Hodges
Poor Little Boy

My youngest was sick last night
vomiting until the dawn
ending with a big, messy poop
He stayed home with me all the next day
tired and weak
Oh so much watching tv
Oh so much washing laundry
“Mom!” he calls
“Mom!”
“What?!” I’m upstairs, across the house
doing laundry of course
“Mom!”
“I’m coming!” I rush off
“Mom!”
“What is it?” Concern is my middle name
“Will you hand me the remotes?”
(although he still says wamotes)
They are three inches from his arm’s reach
I lift them up, sweet and helpful as can be
“What do you need?
You want to turn it off? 
Watch something else? 
Change the volume?”
“Nooooo” he takes them gently
“Just in case”

- Heidi Hodges
A Lesson Learned From A Story Recalled By My Husband After His Walk Around The Lake

Even a 
        bald eagle
can be harassed
by some 
        bold seagulls

- Heidi Hodges
My Children Ask

My children ask
What’s the best thing
I’ve ever done
Marry him

My children ask
What’s the happiest thing
I’ve ever done
Marry him

My children ask
What’s the most annoying thing
I’ve ever done
Have kids

My children laugh

And I tell them
they are annoying and amazing
and smart and silly
and forgetful and fun
and precious and frustrating
and bratty and sweet
and they are too loud
and they don’t always listen
and they are wonderful
and I love being with them

My children ask
Who do I love more
Him or them
And I say

He is special
because I picked him
out of all the people
in the world

My children
I didn’t get to pick
They show up and
I love who they are

- Heidi Hodges
Changey-Feely

I feel like
I am going through
another life change
right now

A subtle mind-shift
But I do feel it
And it feels natural
to go with it

Maybe my changes
are linked with
the changing
seasons

I am ready
to cease hibernation
to start growing
again

- Heidi Hodges
Where Our Hearts Belong
(25.02.22)

In posts online
people send their hearts out
to the poor people
of the country invaded

In a poem I send mine
I also send my heart out
to the poor people
of the country invading

The cruelties of war
do not pick sides

Citizens living under
the rule of aggressors
are all trapped
in governmental games

Our hearts belong
with all those suffering

- Heidi Hodges
I Wrote A Poem

I wrote a poem
called
I read a poem

Poetry is fucking fun
Why don’t you
try writing some

- Heidi Hodges
I Read A Poem

I read a poem
that sounded like something I would write

What would she think
this poet in the woods
to read a poem of mine
written before I’d ever read one of hers

Thoughts and emotions cyclical
Flitting from one to the other
through all of us
spreading
connecting

What would that poet think
if she read a poem of mine
that sounds like something she would write
like something she has experienced

Trilling threads of life
weaving around and through us
humming the truth
for all to hear
for all to say

- Heidi Hodges
A Humble Life

I thought my life would be grander than this

I want to say
but oh how grand it is
when I see a random part of nature
or an act of kindness by a stranger

But no

Those are ordinary wonders
My life is missing the grandeur
of the imagination of my childhood
of the brazenness of my teens

Now I am grown

I’m not rich or famous
high up or followed
I have a humble life
I know I’m still important

Living a tiny magnificent life

- Heidi Hodges
So Softly Bright

A winter morning
so softly bright

I don’t know the names of the birds
but I hear them talk
so I guess I know
what they call themselves

My hot mug
of cinnamon tea 
leaves circles in the frost
on the wood picnic table

The thin tree trunk 
shades light from my eyes
I scoot along the bench
as the sun inches its way

Later it’s warmer
the snow melts away

I am sad the snow is gone
but the chickens will be happy
clucking and shaking feathers
for there is grass to graze again

- Heidi Hodges
You Know

People can’t know
How could they know
I mean really know
You know?

- Heidi Hodges
A Cold Morning

It was nice out this morning
cold
but brisk and sharp
clear and alive
The kind of cold that wakes you up
not beats you up
Sometimes I wonder if there really are different kinds of cold
or if the only difference is
my reception to it

- Heidi Hodges
No One Is Going To Read This
from entry dated 20 January 2021

I have found my diary to be a wonderful place lately. A sanctuary, like people have always said a diary should be, to be my total self and to write about whatever I goddamn feel, however I goddamn want to, no matter what. I truly feel now, like I never did as a kid or teen, that no one is going to read this. No one needs to. I don't know why anyone would want to. It's just for me and that feels a bit... magical.

Time for a mind to wander, time to day dream, to dream of dreams, that is magical, too.

- Heidi Hodges
Being A Woman

I don’t know all what it means to be a woman

But after 34 years
I can tell you what it isn’t

It isn’t dressing up
or wearing make up
or looking pretty
It isn’t your name
or having long hair
or being called Mrs

It isn’t being put down
by a society obsessed with sex
It isn’t believing
that looking powerful is important
It isn’t what they want us to think

After 34 years
I know as much as when I was born
naked and bald
unknowing and sure
I am here
This is me

Being a woman
isn’t what we’ve been conditioned to believe

- Heidi Hodges
L’Envoi

I don’t know all what it means to be a man

But I see the same pressures
with a different twist

It isn’t dressing up
or building muscles
or looking tough
It isn’t your name
or having short hair
or shaking hands

It isn’t being put down
by a society obsessed with sex
It isn’t believing
that looking powerful is important
It isn’t what they want us to think

I see the duresses
separated at birth
when once we were
unknowing and sure
We are here
This is us

Being a man
isn’t what we’ve been conditioned to believe

- Heidi Hodges
Sending Love

My thumbs pressed together point down
My fingers curved up and around
Held in front of my chest sure
Sending love with a gesture

- Heidi Hodges
Autumn

Wonderful weather for walking
The physical feeling of fall
The odor of the atmosphere
Seeing sweet sunsets
Pines piercing the picture
Coolness catches and caresses
Wrapping a robe around
Darkness drowns day
The tacit truth temporal

- Heidi Hodges
Hot Bod

I've got a hot bod
You may not be able to see it
But I do
You may not be able to conceive it
But I did

We've got hot bods
They may not be able to see it
But we do
They may not be able to conceive it
But we did

- Heidi Hodges
Haters Gonna Hate

Haters gonna hate

Polite peeps gon be like
iss'not for me
not right now

- Heidi Hodges
Imagine

Sometimes I feel like an old man
Or how I imagine one would
The kind that sit on a public bench for hours
Wearing a cardigan in full sun

Do my musings match theirs?
Nuggets of wisdom
Past mistakes made
Dreams for the future

Do I observe as they do?
Appreciate a passerby outfit
Process an article earlier read
Think how birds are really cool

I wonder if old men sometimes feel like young women
Or how they imagine one would
We can all wear seasonably inappropriate clothing,
    be wise
And know it, too

- Heidi Hodges
Inspired

Be inspired by the greats!
Not jealous of the mediocres.

- Heidi Hodges
The Hardest Part

The hardest part of being a woman
is letting it be easy

- Heidi Hodges
Swans On The Bay

I saw swans on the bay today
They made me smile
Driving away from the beach

I can’t recall seeing swans on the bay
since that sunset in early December
all those years ago

You pretended your shoelace came loose
over and over again
getting down on one knee

Swans were there
Geese flew overhead
It almost began to seem like a dream

But those swans were there today
They made me smile
Educing that day in early December

- Heidi Hodges
Meal Problems

MoOOoOooOom
Pause to take a bite
This is too big
I can't bite it
Eats a while; biting, chewing
MoOOoOooOom
Pauses to take several bites
It's still
too
big!

- Heidi Hodges
I Am A Poet

po
eh
tree
flows from me
ee
zeh
lee

- Heidi Hodges
    Shrug

                      shrug

                                              shrug

    shrug
                                   shrug
     

                 shrug

                                          shrug
          
       shrug
                          
                             shrug


   - Heidi Hodges

A Weekend Away

leaving town
being alone
remembering my past
I thought
I almost
lost myself
a bit

or I realized that the way I define myself is a 
   nebulous creation based on the stuff that 
   usually surrounds me

either one

- Heidi Hodges
Orbit

We grew up a few blocks apart
Years later tagged along with a friend
Unaware our stars collided
His eyes on her, I played the field
Then, then
That coffee kiss
Nebular perplexity slow to become love
Falling into perfect orbit
Vulpes et Ammissarius
And now, and now
Shifting, dancing
You think I could contain him in a poem?

- Heidi Hodges
Kaladin

You heal you kill
You brood you joke
You're unkempt and you're handsome
If only you weren't
a fictional bloke
I'd definitely try to get some

- Heidi Hodges
Parenting

pain in my head
        No!
throat tripped raw from screaming
                Stop!
giggling, unashamed
                        Why?!
pain between us all
                                No!
ears ring hollow from wailing
                Stop!
torture, undeserved

Why?

- Heidi Hodges
Kiss

Kiss my lips
They taste like chips

- Heidi Hodges
Haiku #1

Rain calm and steady
Cold and brisk and bundled warm
Grey out, light brown in

- Heidi Hodges
Chill

Cool air, chirping
Fire burning around us, choking
Cool air, chilling
Waiting for us to shut up, listen
Cool air, feeling
Stick my neck out for that cool air

- Heidi Hodges
Sexism Is Annoying

Dear sexist men,

I am a woman.
I can lift things up
and put them back down.
Heavy things.
All by myself.
Keep your fucking comments and doubts;
Carry that shit around yourself.

Love,
Heidi Hodges
Dancing

Will you dance with me
Will you get close
It's just dancing
No one has to know

- Heidi Hodges
Like Chocolate

Mmm love letters like chocolate
Luxurious and necessary
Just run to the corner store
Breathe soul onto that paper

- Heidi Hodges
Another Idea

Oh, you want to go to sleep now?
But I got something for ya
Ideas, woman! Ideas!
Stay up
Write down
Stay up
Write down

- Heidi Hodges
Dance All The Time

Slow dance when you're sad
Kick dance when you're mad
Pump it when you're glad
Krunk it like you're bad

- Heidi Hodges
Paint

Let's paint a picture
Our lives swirled together
Gold dusting of lust
Our lips brush
Hearts expand from the pressure

- Heidi Hodges
Look Up

What are you doing here?
Look up
Look around you
Are there people nearby?
Talk to them
I DARE YOU

- Heidi Hodges
Types

Why am I so afraid of screwing up?
What if there was something wrong with all of us?
Who doesn't like eating cake icing straight with a spoon?
Okay, but who does?

There are two types of people in this world
    And two types of those people
        And two types of those people

Individuals
Individually flawed

- Heidi Hodges
Wait A Minute

I want to be friends, too
I don't really know you
either of you
But you're having fun
so I want to be included.

It would be less fun, though
We're not friends because
we're not friends
Cut the pretenses
We're all just fine where we are

- Heidi Hodges
When I Love

I love it when
Cats come up to me
Snuggling is an option
The kids are happy to see me come home
My husband and I share a joke with only a look
Something sparkles naturally
The words are just right and enough

- Heidi Hodges
Graphite Diamonds

It is I
that turns this graphite
into Diamonds

- Heidi Hodges
The Future

The future
Unknown, steadfastly

The choice
Sprout of Hope vs. Jitters of Doubt

- Heidi Hodges
Verbing

Be cool
Breathe

Be radical
Calm

- Heidi Hodges
Share

I just want to share
we all just want to share
something
about ourselves
sorry not sorry
I don't have a brand

- Heidi Hodges
Feeling A Fool

Some times
I make a fool of myself
And some of those times
It's only in my head

- Heidi Hodges
Lunch Revelation

Sitting, calmly, midday meal
Biting, chewing, clinking, slurping
Amid the lunchtime sounds interjected
'Mama...
I want to start wearing an eyepatch'

- Heidi Hodges
Try

The things is
I'm going to try
but
I'm not going to try too hard

- Heidi Hodges
My Husband

My husband
doesn't wait below
to catch me
He's up in the sky dancing
with me

- Heidi Hodges
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